Character Makeover: 40 Days with a Life Coach to Create the Best You Review

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Character Makeover: 40 Days with a Life Coach to Create the Best You ReviewI feel a little bit like I'm cheating by writing a review of the book, "Character Makeover: 40 Days With A Life Coach To Create The Best You" (Zondervan, 2008), by Katie Brazelton and Shelley Leith. First, it is geared towards women. I'm a man. Second, it is laid out in a such a way that a person really ought to spend 40 days with it. I've only had my Advance Reader Copy for 2 days. So, given that I am not of the female persuasion, nor have I had the 40 days to live out the principles discussed in the book, I will give my general impressions.
Generally, I shy away from any product that promises to change a person after so many days or weeks. They tend to be too simplistic, not speaking to the difficulties, interruptions, and disappointments that tend to come with real life. I am even more wary of Christian self-help books, because they tend to garner more of their techniques and bullet points from pop psychology rather than Scripture. This is dangerous in that it retards a person's ability to discern things spiritually.
That being said, I like how much "Character Makeover" relies on Scripture and does not attempt to trivialize the things that people go to. This book isn't about pretending real life doesn't happen. Quite the contrary. Through the use of the stories of various women who have struggled with character issues as they face everyday life, "Character Makeover" keeps its head out of the clouds and its feet firmly planted on the earth. Rather, this book is a resource women can turn to in order to help them change their perspective and temper their reactions when life isn't fair.
Its greatest strength comes from the fact it starts off with the notion that if we wish to develop better character, we must first attend to our relationship with Jesus. The authors thus start the book with a section about humility. This is a great approach, as a person who "changes themselves" can be tempted to boast about all the changes they have made and how good that makes them because of it. However, by connecting true change to God, this encourages women to be humble in how they approach the rest of the book (and their lives).
However, "Character Makeover" is not without its drawbacks. Actually, one of its greatest strengths is one of its greatest flaws. This is not a book that a person can just sit down and enjoy like a novel. It is meant to be an immersive experience. This is accomplished through journal entries, charts to fill out, and boxes to check (on self-evaluation checklists). It is a lot of work and a person has to be totally honest with themselves (or others if they are participating in a group), if they wish to truly get anything out of the experience.
And the questions are not easy ones. For example, on Day 4 of a section about self-control, the reader is asked, "What habit or temptation has power over you?" While this question might seem simple on the surface, it is very easy to answer this question simply, avoiding darker things we know we ought to deal with in our lives. A person might answer, "I have a problem with chocolate," and that may very well be true. But, if they have a habit of gossiping or not controlling their thought life, having a problem with chocolate is the least of their worries. But, the main drawback is that some people don't have the time each day to sit down and follow this kind of program. While the authors might not mind 40 days stretching into 80 or 120 days, some readers may become frustrated and give up.
Overall, "Character Makeover" is a good resource for those who can stick with a 40 day program. I believe they will come out on the other side with the ability to discern situations from a thoroughly Christian point-of-view without sacrificing their ability to live in the real world.
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Personality Types: Using the Enneagram for Self-Discovery Review

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Personality Types: Using the Enneagram for Self-Discovery ReviewThe main purpose of this book is to type yourself in order that you should know how to become a fully integrated individual. Understanding of the self is one step to self-discovery, but the next step, as the book illustrates, is to move toward one's 'point of integration', to attain one's full potential. To that end 'Character Types' has been heaven-sent for me. It becomes painfully clear that left to ourselves, we attempt to improve in the way which is exactly the opposite of what we really need. As a Four, I was constantly introspecting and obsessing, certain that if I did so long enough I would understand everything. Not until I read this book did I understand that the only way to improve would be to fight my natural tendencies, to become more open to experiencing and to take things easier. This insight, though it sounds small, leaves me indebted to Don Riso for writing a book which was as effective as any 12-step program, and which will be applicable for the rest of my life in setting goals to strive towards.
On the other hand, this book should come with some disclaimers. The first is that this book should not be used in rigidly 'typing' other individuals besides yourself. The fact is, no one can ever presume to know what goes on inside another human being, and that natural barrier should be respected. Even if someone exhibits all the signs of a certain type, they should still be respected as the complex people they are, instead of being consigned to a filing cabinet. For people to start saying, "Oh, he's such a typical Five, always reading" is ridiculous, even degrading. For a basic understanding of the many facets of human nature, reading about the other types is fascinating--but that's as far as these descriptions should be taken to apply to real-life individuals and relationships.
Also, people should take the type descriptions with a grain of salt. The book is sometimes too specific--these types should be used to describe general tendencies, not specific details within the personality. Just because I am a certain type, that does not mean I cannot be radically different from others who share my type. The world is a wonderfully complex place, and people are the most complex things in it. Sharing some similarities *does not* make us the same.
The parental orientations, while interesting to read and perhaps even relevant sometimes, are the equivalent to psychobabble on some level and should also be taken with a grain of salt. The typing of celebrities is completely irrelevant, for reasons already expressed above.
Taken all in all, 'Character Types' is a valuable tool toward attaining self-discovery and understanding the means to attain one's full potential. The levels of development are charted at length, and the points of integration and disintegration highlight the manner in which people deteriorate, or more positively, the way they achieve health and integration. It also provides insight into people other than yourself, making it possible to appreciate the differences in each human being. For a book on the Enneagram, look no further than this.Personality Types: Using the Enneagram for Self-Discovery Overview

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Integrity: The Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality Review

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Integrity: The Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality ReviewThe Collins imprint of HarperCollins Publishers continues to pour out a very impressive stream of books that address ethical issues in business. Dr. Henry Cloud's book, "Integrity," published just a few weeks ago, is the latest offering in this genre. I found it to be a very encouraging, challenging and ultimately uplifting work. Henry Cloud, despite his background as a psychologist, manages to avoid the "psychobabble" one often encounters in reading clinicians who opine on business ethics. He anchors his thoughts in the real world of clients he has consulted with in helping them to address very real and concrete business issues that have deep roots in issues of ethics and integrity.
Dr. Cloud makes it clear that "integrity," as he uses the term, is much more than mere "honesty." Throughout the book he parses and elucidates six essential qualities and character traits that lead to success in the business world. He describes the kind of character that . . .
1) Creates and maintains trust
2) Is able to see and face reality
3) Works in a way that brings results
4) Embraces negative realities and solves them
5) Causes growth and increase
6) Achieves transcendence and meaning in life
"You will see how these character traits supercede gifts, talents and ability, and how the ones who have them succeed and the ones who don't, ultimately fail." (Page xii)
In this review, I will offer more quotations than I typically do in writing about a book. The reasons for this proliferation of quotes are that I want to share a fair sample of Dr. Cloud's nuggets, and he states the case very well in his own words. I could not improve upon them through more extensive commentary.
In talking with a wealthy businessman who is a personal friend, Dr. Cloud heard his friend comment on how he chooses to invest his money in businesses.
"I did not invest in those businesses. I invested in the people. I never invest in businesses I don't know anything about, but I will invest in a person. If I know their character, their history, how they operate, what kind of judgment they have, what kinds of risks are acceptable to them, how they execute, and things like that, and I know them well, I will invest. But I don't buy businesses I don't know anything about." (Pages 29-30)
Early in this book, Dr. Cloud gives us his expanded definition of integrity as it applies to the business world:
"And, the origins of the word we can see in the French and Latin meanings of intact, integrate, integral and entirety. The concept means that the `whole thing is working well, undivided, integrated, intact and uncorrupted.' When we are talking about integrity, we are talking about being a whole person, an integrated person, with all of our different parts working well and delivering the functions that they were designed to deliver. It is about wholeness and effectiveness as people. It truly is `running on all cylinders.'" (Page 31)
The author offers a very clear and helpful metaphor for the type of impact that this kind of person of integrity has on the lives of those with whom she or he interacts. Dr. Cloud posits that each of us, as we move through the waters of life, leave behind a wake, like that left by ships as they pass through the ocean. There are two aspects to the "wake" that we leave behind - the tasks we have performed and the relationships we have built.
"We leave a wake of people behind us as we move though their lives and their organizations. . . So, we must ask ourselves, `What does that wake look like?' Are a lot of people out there water-skiing on the wake, smiling, having a great time for our having `moved through their lives'? Or are they are there bobbing for air, bleeding, and left wounded as shark bait?" (Page 18)
In the chapter on Building Trust Through Connections, Cloud offers this profound insight that helps us to understand the difference between those persons and companies that command loyalty and those that do not:
"The human heart will seek to be known, understood, and connected with above all else. If you do not connect, the ones you care about will find someone who will." (Page 70)
Applying this principle alone in most companies today would dramatically reduce the costs of employee theft, turnover, recruiting, retention and succession planning.
In the chapter on Trust Through Vulnerability, Cloud talks about an early childhood experience he had with his mother that caused him to trust her more deeply than he might otherwise have been able to do.
"I needed a model that was strong enough to depend on, but vulnerable enough to identify with. That combination is what made it work. In essence, it said, `Hey, she is like me, in that she is afraid sometimes and feels like she can't do it. But, she does it anyway. She pushes forward.'
Her vulnerability is what made her power available to me." (Page 92)
In sharing What People In Touch Look Like, Dr. Cloud recounts an incident that happened on a retreat for CEO's, when a young "superstar" was given an opportunity to receive feedback from a more senior CEO.
"One of the more experienced guys looked up and said, `Want some feedback?' He said it in a way that left you wondering whether he was going to give sage advice or rail at the young man for being out to lunch in some way. There was just no way to tell from his poker face. But I will never forget the young superstar's immediate response: `By all means. Give me a gift.' He saw the feedback, whatever it was, as a gift because it could give him some reality that he did not know. I remember thinking, `We will be watching this guy's accomplishments for a long time.'" (Page 116)
Cloud then ratchets up the significance of this insight by suggesting a challenging way for us to put this principle of inviting feedback to a practical test:
"If you want to know your comfort level in this matter, think of going to the people you work with or are in close personal relationships with and give them 100 percent permission to be totally honest with you in answering the question: `What is it like to be on the other end of me?'" (Pages 116-117)
I must draw to a close this review, lest I run the risk of conveying Cloud's whole book to you via this Blog! I want to encourage you to buy the book as an investment in yourself and in your growth and success. But, in closing, I will share a final excerpt that captures the essence of what this book is all about:
"I just returned from an international leadership summit in which the leaders discussed their personal orientations toward growth. One global leader said that about ten years ago, he was near burnout and collapse, as his organization had exploded in size. But, he himself was dying. So, with input from his board, he made a huge investment of both time and money. He decided that every summer he would take six weeks away to study, refresh, get input into his soul, and re-create. He put the number two person in charge with orders not to call him `unless the whole thing were burning down.'" (Pages 222-223)
Dr. Cloud chose to protect the anonymity of this global leader. I do not know if he was referring to Pastor Bill Hybels of WillowCreek Church, but I have heard with my own ears Pastor Hybels share a similar story of taking intentional steps to prevent burnout by making the difficult decision to get away from daily pressures in order to carve out some time to recharge the batteries and to reinvigorate the soul. That is the very heart of integrity.
Most business leaders I know will find something of value in this book that they can internalize and begin to apply immediately - for their own benefit and for the benefit of all those who are "surfing their wake."
Enjoy.
Al ChaseIntegrity: The Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality Overview

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Leaders Who Last Review

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Leaders Who Last ReviewThe title of this book made me want to read it. The first two sentences made me want to read it even more. In his foreword, Mark Driscoll writes: "Pastor Dave Kraft is in the right season of life to write this book. By the time this book is published he will be seventy years of age" (p. 11). That was enough to make want to listen, and listen hard, to what this man had to say. So, I read the book in three different sittings in a thirty-six hour time frame. I'm glad I did.
Dave Kraft is a good writer, with a simple, straightforward style. The book is clear and confident. Kraft knows what he wants to say to leaders and says it. I was immediately drawn in with the book's clear flow-of-thought, which is evident from the contents.
Part One: Foundations
Chapter 1. The Leader's Power
Chapter 2. The Leader's Purpose
Chapter 3. The Leader's Passion
Chapter 4. The Leader's Priorities
Chapter 5. The Leader's Pacing
Part Two: Formation
Chapter 6. The Leader's Calling
Chapter 7. The Leader's Gifts
Chapter 8. The Leader's Character
Chapter 9. The Leader's Growth
Part Three: Fruitfulness
Chapter 10. The Leader's Vision
Chapter 11. The Leader's Influence
Chapter 12. The Leader's Legacy
The chapters are short, to the point, and seasoned with good illustrations and striking quotations of leaders from a variety of different contexts. For example, here's a great quotation about character from the legendary coach, John Wooden: "Be more concerned with your character than with your reputation, because your character is what you really are while your reputation is merely what others think you are" (p. 98). There are lots of these leadership maxims scattered through the book, so read with a highlighter handy. You'll want to remember some of these.
But even more important is the wisdom with which Dave Kraft writes. One gets the sense in reading these pages that he is a man who has lived intentionally and maintained a learning posture throughout his life. His insights and convictions come through loud and clear and without apology. Here are a few that caught my attention. (Keep in mind that this is a book written primarily for people in Christian leadership.)
* "Leadership begins and ends with a clear understanding of the gospel and being rooted in the grace of Jesus Christ as a gift." (p. 29)
* "It is vitally important that each of us discovers his own pathway to deep intimacy with the Lord Jesus Christ." (p. 32)
* "Passion will have more of an impact than personality." (p. 50)
* "If a person's gift mix is not predominantly in the speaking category, that person should not consider a major leadership role." (p. 89)
* "A lifelong learner asks all kinds of questions, reads broadly, writes down new ideas, learns from opposing thoughts, and is growing in Christian character." (p. 113)
* "Be careful with whom you spend the bulk of your time. A leader influences many by investing in a few and letting those few influence the rest." (p. 128)
* "Today, the crying need is for more leaders. To grow by addition, you recruit more followers. To grow by multiplication, you add more leaders." (p. 139)
And, the most importance sentence in the book (for me): "If you need people, you can't lead people." Now that's a hard saying, but a very important insight. The following sentences puts in context. "There is an inability or lack of desire to make the tough calls, speak the truth, or do the hard things. Motivated by a fear of disappointing people, this inability will seriously hamper and work against your ability to lead." (p. 132)
These, however, are just a few of the gems found in this wise and helpful book. Most of the chapters also include helpful, practical advice about how to implement the principles being taught. For example, the chapter on priorities (building on the previous chapters) outlines an eight step process for determining how and where to spend your time, moving you through purpose, passion, goals, plans, priorities, schedule, execution, and evaluation. It's a fairly simple approach, but it's doable - as is all the other advice Kraft gives.
So, I highly recommend this book. Though it is a brief book and doesn't say everything that can or should be said about leadership, what it does say is said well and sticks. Kraft's Leaders Who Last has a quality similar to J. Oswald Sanders' classic Spiritual Leadership from a generation ago. If I could summarize what I appreciate most about this book into three brief things it would be these: (1) There is a strong emphasis on depth of personal devotion to Jesus, out of which flows everything else. (2) There is a strong emphasis on multiplying other leaders. (3) It is written by someone who has done it for over forty years. `Nough said.Leaders Who Last Overview

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Praying for Purpose for Women: A Prayer Experience That Will Change Your Life Forever (Pathway to Purpose) Review

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Praying for Purpose for Women: A Prayer Experience That Will Change Your Life Forever (Pathway to Purpose) ReviewHow can we really know the heart of God concerning us without prayer? How can we have confidence toward God and His plan and purpose for our lives unless we develop it through prayer? And how could we ever hope to actually live out His will if we refuse to or are lazy in our praying?
The ultimate value in Katie Brazelton's Praying for Purpose is that it engages us in what is arguably one of the most critical disciplines of a Christian's life--prayer. The prayer-per-day format is convenient and provides structure for what can sometimes become an aimless and wandering effort to pray through to an answer from God on a particular topic in our lives. Each day's reading begins with an introduction; provides a modern-day example of a woman who has triumphed, or not, in that day's topic of discussion, includes a targeted question designed to spark honest thought and ends with a short vignette related to a person in the Bible. Finally, the reader is left with a scripture reference to ponder, guided through a prayer and encouraged to identify an insight or action step resulting from that day's reading.
Perhaps including more examples of single women would broaden the appeal, but the stories of contemporary and biblical people who faced the same issues we do today can comfort any woman who may feel alone in her pursuit of purpose, and the confusion and uncertainty which often accompany that pursuit. The questions and space to list action items moves us from inward reflection to outward behavior.
Added bonuses are the special format and activity for Day 60, the classification exercise in Part Two, and the concluding activity which invites each woman to solicit feedback from a trusted friend regarding her responses to all the questions for each day's reading. What a treat!
Praying for Purpose is certainly worth the price on its own, but is even more valuable as a companion volume to the foundational book-Pathway to Purpose(TM) for Women. If read thoughtfully and interacted with honestly, this book will indeed change your life by getting you that much closer to seeing His purpose for your life.Praying for Purpose for Women: A Prayer Experience That Will Change Your Life Forever (Pathway to Purpose) Overview

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